#MHM2021: Q&A with Dr. Sara Sadek

In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, Wellness x Nature “sat down” with Dr. Sara Sadek, a psychologist based in NYC (and also a dear friend!).

Wellness x Nature: Hi Dr. Sadek! Thank you for taking the time to answer some of our questions in honor of Mental Health Awareness month. Mental health issues are at an all time high right now - which of course perfectly aligns with the global pandemic we’ve all experienced the past year! Do you feel like you were busier this past year? Or that you were seeing the effects of the pandemic in general?

Dr. Sara Sadek: Yes, it’s been a really challenging year and it’s definitely reflected in my work schedule. It’s been pretty hectic.

We are all definitely seeing the effects of the pandemic. Besides the normal uptick in anxiety and fear for the future/unknown, there has been a host of other things that the pandemic has contributed to:

1. Loneliness and social isolation

2. Sleeplessness/insomnia

3. Increases in Depressive Episodes–inability to use normal coping skills of exercise, increased socialization, work/life balance, relaxation techniques, all things that generally are used to keep depressive episodes at bay

4. Increased substance abuse/self-medicating 

5. General health decays–from lack of movement, lack of being outside, normal physical activity

6. Relationship turmoil–relational problems that could normally be avoided through long hours at work or avoiding time together has highlighted unhealthy or toxic factors of relationships

7. Working from home has become “living at work”–employers are now expecting responses and “work” at unusual times of the day and expect their employees to always be available

WxN: What made you decide to get into this field? Is it something you always knew you wanted to do?

SS: I really wanted to become a medical doctor. I was always curious about illness and as a child would research symptoms and treatments. I still do that actually. During my childhood it was an odd quality but random people would come and tell me their secrets. Whether it was kids in school telling me about abuse at home, etc, to working as a teller at a bank in college and customers telling me about their abortions or infidelity or divorce...I was oddly someone people would want to share personal things with. I still find it kind of crazy. I didn’t know what to do with the information, but I knew that they needed to talk to someone and feel validated.

I studied biology for 4 years in college and it was made clear to me that I didn’t have what it takes to get into med school. I would study until 3am most nights, get good grades, but my friends were barely studying and it just clicked for them differently. Fortunately I had a great neuropsychology professor who suggested I go the clinical psychology route, and once I switched majors, it felt right. Felt like the right fit. 

WxN: Toxic positivity is such a buzzword these days - what are your feelings about the idea of staying impossibly upbeat during what could be considered a crisis?

SS: I don’t believe in false positivity. I think it’s inauthentic. There is a difference in trying to break up or disrupt the negative thought cycles and try to change our general perceptions to that of gratitude and thankfulness...but the idea that one should be upbeat, particularly when we are not, is a problem. Minimizing or denying our sadness generally doesn’t work. Just creates incongruence: you’re sad on the inside but acting happy. I believe in listening to your body, whether it’s your anxiety or your depression, generally these emotions are there to tell us something: that we need to change things in our lives and to remove the obstacles to our happiness. Also, I think positive or “happy” people, sometimes have these elated moments, but generally happiness looks more like contentment and peace, not extreme emotions of joy. We need to have a more accurate view of happiness.

WxN: Talk therapy plays such a huge role in my own self-care regimen - why do you feel it’s so important? 

SS: I think when we ruminate or hold things in, they always seem so much bigger than they really are. Human beings are relational creatures, we need intimacy and validation. There are seasons of our lives where things become difficult and overwhelming, it helps to discuss our concerns, receive validation, recognize patterns of our behaviors, and through learning who we are and how we operate, find tools that help us succeed or avoid pitfalls. Each person has strengths and weaknesses, sometimes understanding them, helps us play to our strengths and not fall into unhealthy patterns.

WxN: What other self-care regimens do you suggest? What self-care regimens do you suggest for those who don't have the time or resources to commit to what feels like a full time routine?

SS: Treat your mental health as a priority. Do things that tell your brain, “wow I must be really important because look at all these things I’m doing for myself.” And it always starts with physical health first: exercise, go on walks, and be outside. Eat healthy. Read about sleep hygiene and make sure you’re getting enough sleep. Be kind to yourself and participate in activities that build you up.

WxN: On that note, what are your own routines, and what do you like to do when you’re not seeing patients? 

SS: I make sure that I go for an hour long walk almost every day. Sometimes I do it with a patient on the phone, but mostly it’s after work. Walking home from work helps me decompress and allows me the time to really think things through and analyze carefully. Also makes me a nicer and calmer person when I get home to my family.

I schedule family time and what I want to do with the girls. I am very specific with my scheduling, even as small as playing a game of rummikub or uno. When I’m not intentional with my time, I notice that we end up all doing something different and barely interacting.

I do love photography and I’m not great at it but it makes me happy. It also has trained me to constantly scan my environment for beauty, which I think makes me more grateful and present.

I speak to my friends often. I have weekly calls with people who are really close with me -that type of socialization, where we talk about very real things, really helps.

I’m extremely careful about my sleep–as someone who has suffered from childhood insomnia, I’m extremely careful about sleep disturbances. I don’t drink coffee past 9am, don’t watch TV before bed, and wake up early so I’m tired enough to fall asleep at a reasonable time. The older I get, the more I realize how my cognition and emotions are completely at the mercy of me getting enough rest/sleep.

WxN: Tell me about how the quarantine affected the way you see patients - in what ways was seeing patients remotely beneficial and in what ways was it challenging? Did you have to get creative?

SS: Yes of course. Had to switch everyone to telehealth, patients chose whether they wanted video or phone. I just recently started in-person sessions with fully vaccinated patients. Fortunately at the beginning of quarantine, I had a very generous close friend let me use her empty apartment so I could have privacy and then as things opened up I was able to go into my office. It was nearly impossible to work from home, purely because of the volume/noise my lovely daughters and husband would make...all...day...long.

WxN: There has been some promising, albeit mostly anecdotal, research regarding the regular usage of hemp-derived tonics and tinctures to help ease the symptoms of stress and anxiety. What would you say to a patient that asked you about this?

SS: I would first say to make sure you speak to your medical doctor about any type of self-medication. I have had many patients use cbd oil or infused bath bombs, etc to help them decompress and they report it to be very helpful. I can’t speak from personal experience, only from anecdotal feedback, but those who have used and have a routine, especially when it comes to helping reduce anxiety and increasing calmness before sleep, have reported it to be effective.

WxN: Lastly, what would you say to someone that displayed signs of mental health issues, to try to encourage them to speak to someone? What words of advice would you offer to friends and loved ones of someone suffering, in order to best support them?

SS: I think being genuine and kind is always where to start. Be compassionate and not accusatory. Validate without providing fixes or solutions. If you feel overwhelmed by their emotions and don’t know how to help, it’s okay to be honest and say that and suggest they speak to someone that has tools and the experience to help. It’s rarely the correct words, the delivery matters most.

Thanks to Dr. Sadek, and thanks to you for reading! Let us know below how you’re taking care of your mental health this month and every month.